The busy B's of Beantown
In this second installment of a 30 part series, the WCHL will take a look at each team and have a look at the good, bad and comical of each of the 30 teams in the WCHL. Next up, the Boston Bruins.
The Boston Bruins last tasted champagne from the WCHL Cup in Season 4.
It's been a wacky road the past everal years for the Boston Bruins, once a model of stability in the WCHL.
Dave Herr came in on day one of the WCHL and quickly established the Bruins as one of the greatest teams in the league. While the club faced several playoff collapses, they did capture one WCHL title and were annointed as agruably the greatest WCHL franchise of the first five years of the league, trailing perhaps only the San Jose Sharks.
Oh how things have changed. With herr moving on for greener pastures, the Bruins have seen approximately a dozen General Managers come in and try and fill his shoes, all failing spectacularly in the process. Newly hired Nolan Evans is the latest to try and buck that trend and get ths B's back into the prime time.
To do so, they'll need to create a new identity. Actually AN indentity would be helpful. The team Herr compiled is long gone, with Joe Thornton's departure -with no effort from the team to resign him as well- completely the long and painful death of the once proud franchise. Now they much try and forge a positive transformation out of the ashes left behind.
Joe Thornton's depature signal a big change for the club.
"What a friggin gong show," said Thornton of the Bruins, days after inking a new contract in free agency with the Dallas Stars. "If they wanted to go a different direction, that's fine, but to not even get an offer from them, a Dear John letter, a kiss my ass, nothing, that's insulting. I hope they all choke."
Thornton wasn't the only one to vent their frustration Boston's way.
"Evans is going to need all the help he can get," said winger Justin Williams, a prized pick up for Herr's at one point. "They seem to have no direction. I hope that changes now, that fanbase deserves better."
Former B's winger Justin Williams is shocked by the current state of affairs for the Bruins.
And it appears the fans have been as frustrated, if not more so. A free donut giveaway went tragically wrong last Thursday. Giving the first 10,000 fans a dozen donuts as a promotional piece for the recently opened You'll Love Eating Our Holes donut chain, fans elected to use the tasty treats as ammunition in their attack on a Bruins team which has gone 13-12-1 so far this season and sits 11th in the Eastern Conference. Turning each donut into several smaller projectile pieces, fans rained down donuts, firing them towards the ice surface during Boston's 4-0 loss to the Carolina Hurricanes. One of the pieces hit a bat which had roosted inside The Harvard Square arena, prompting the bat to go into a frenzy, attacking several fans in the crowd and staff members, one of which was a quadrapelegic named Eduardo El Slavador Mentega Estrato Jose Quatradita Jesus Ramone Giseppe III. He died from what was termed as 'excessive puncture wounds' to several areas of his body. Fourteen other fans have been undergoing extensive rabies testing meanwhile and the event was playfully dubbed as the Bat Outta Hell moment. Hardly a picturesque moment for the troubled franchise.
So what to do?
The first seems to be revamping the financial picture of the team, something which was done first with Thornton being let go, but the club is also rumoured to be heavily involved in shipping out netminder Ryan Miller and his $11 million salary. Miller's play has been solid, but not spectacular this season, making him harder to move as a result.
All-USA goalie Ryan Miller may soon be on his way out of Boston.
The team has also made some bigger moves already, picking up younger players in Darren Helm, Keith Yandle and Jakub Kindl in an effort to bolster an aging line up. What they really need is some offense from their top forwards. Thus far, only two players are averaging even a point every second game, and none are above that level, with the majority of the clubs offense being driven from the backend.
"(Alexei) Kovalev and (Brendan) Morrison have six (expletative deleted) goals put together. I know they're old, but (expletative deleted) off. That's crap. I've seen a cock-eyed inbred gay monkey score more than these two," said Bruins Head Coach Ken Hitchcock.
Alexei Kovalev (left) and Brendan Morrison have found the doghouse under Head Coach Ken Hitchcock.
Boston sits 25th in goalscoring and 29th in shots per game, so getting to the net more often would do wonders for this club.
"We need to do more of that for sure," admitted winger Rene Bourque. "We need to try and score. We got to think of it like college and just gets shit-faced and try and score. It worked well with the ladies back then, I don't see why it wouldn't work in scoring goals. Same principal, right?"
Rene Bourque thinks the same ideal of scoring with women applies to goals. That makes him a fucktwit.
In this second installment of a 30 part series, the WCHL will take a look at each team and have a look at the good, bad and comical of each of the 30 teams in the WCHL. Next up, the Boston Bruins.
The Boston Bruins last tasted champagne from the WCHL Cup in Season 4.
It's been a wacky road the past everal years for the Boston Bruins, once a model of stability in the WCHL.
Dave Herr came in on day one of the WCHL and quickly established the Bruins as one of the greatest teams in the league. While the club faced several playoff collapses, they did capture one WCHL title and were annointed as agruably the greatest WCHL franchise of the first five years of the league, trailing perhaps only the San Jose Sharks.
Oh how things have changed. With herr moving on for greener pastures, the Bruins have seen approximately a dozen General Managers come in and try and fill his shoes, all failing spectacularly in the process. Newly hired Nolan Evans is the latest to try and buck that trend and get ths B's back into the prime time.
To do so, they'll need to create a new identity. Actually AN indentity would be helpful. The team Herr compiled is long gone, with Joe Thornton's departure -with no effort from the team to resign him as well- completely the long and painful death of the once proud franchise. Now they much try and forge a positive transformation out of the ashes left behind.
Joe Thornton's depature signal a big change for the club.
"What a friggin gong show," said Thornton of the Bruins, days after inking a new contract in free agency with the Dallas Stars. "If they wanted to go a different direction, that's fine, but to not even get an offer from them, a Dear John letter, a kiss my ass, nothing, that's insulting. I hope they all choke."
Thornton wasn't the only one to vent their frustration Boston's way.
"Evans is going to need all the help he can get," said winger Justin Williams, a prized pick up for Herr's at one point. "They seem to have no direction. I hope that changes now, that fanbase deserves better."
Former B's winger Justin Williams is shocked by the current state of affairs for the Bruins.
And it appears the fans have been as frustrated, if not more so. A free donut giveaway went tragically wrong last Thursday. Giving the first 10,000 fans a dozen donuts as a promotional piece for the recently opened You'll Love Eating Our Holes donut chain, fans elected to use the tasty treats as ammunition in their attack on a Bruins team which has gone 13-12-1 so far this season and sits 11th in the Eastern Conference. Turning each donut into several smaller projectile pieces, fans rained down donuts, firing them towards the ice surface during Boston's 4-0 loss to the Carolina Hurricanes. One of the pieces hit a bat which had roosted inside The Harvard Square arena, prompting the bat to go into a frenzy, attacking several fans in the crowd and staff members, one of which was a quadrapelegic named Eduardo El Slavador Mentega Estrato Jose Quatradita Jesus Ramone Giseppe III. He died from what was termed as 'excessive puncture wounds' to several areas of his body. Fourteen other fans have been undergoing extensive rabies testing meanwhile and the event was playfully dubbed as the Bat Outta Hell moment. Hardly a picturesque moment for the troubled franchise.
So what to do?
The first seems to be revamping the financial picture of the team, something which was done first with Thornton being let go, but the club is also rumoured to be heavily involved in shipping out netminder Ryan Miller and his $11 million salary. Miller's play has been solid, but not spectacular this season, making him harder to move as a result.
All-USA goalie Ryan Miller may soon be on his way out of Boston.
The team has also made some bigger moves already, picking up younger players in Darren Helm, Keith Yandle and Jakub Kindl in an effort to bolster an aging line up. What they really need is some offense from their top forwards. Thus far, only two players are averaging even a point every second game, and none are above that level, with the majority of the clubs offense being driven from the backend.
"(Alexei) Kovalev and (Brendan) Morrison have six (expletative deleted) goals put together. I know they're old, but (expletative deleted) off. That's crap. I've seen a cock-eyed inbred gay monkey score more than these two," said Bruins Head Coach Ken Hitchcock.
Alexei Kovalev (left) and Brendan Morrison have found the doghouse under Head Coach Ken Hitchcock.
Boston sits 25th in goalscoring and 29th in shots per game, so getting to the net more often would do wonders for this club.
"We need to do more of that for sure," admitted winger Rene Bourque. "We need to try and score. We got to think of it like college and just gets shit-faced and try and score. It worked well with the ladies back then, I don't see why it wouldn't work in scoring goals. Same principal, right?"
Rene Bourque thinks the same ideal of scoring with women applies to goals. That makes him a fucktwit.
