Flames; Ducks dominating early

The Western Conference is normally the domain of the San jose Sharks in the regular season. The perrenial powerhouse have captured more regular season titles than can be counted off the top of ones' head, but this year those same Sharks could be in tough to repeat last seasons dominating 134 point effort.
 
Starting the year 7-3-2 is a good start, but the Sharks face stiff opposition from the Calgary Flames and Anaheim Ducks, two teams who have underachieved at times in recent yeas themselves.
 
The Flames are rolling along on a nine-game winning streak at the moment and sit tops in the WCHL with a a12-2 record. During their nine game onslaught, the Flames have torched the opposition, outscoring them 42-18 along the way. Five of those wins have come against conference opponents.
 
"We are playing the way we should be," said GM Lawson Cham. "This team is a beast and I've just let them out of their cage, baby. Roooaaaaaarrrrrrrr!"
 

 
Flames GM Lawson Cham was in full groove mode with girlfriend Ivanna Humpya after the Flames won their ninth straight game.
 
Leading the way are forwards Steven Stamkos, Mike Richards and Daniel Briere, who have combined for 29 goals and 65 points in 14 games this season. Defenseman Dustin Byfuglien has posted 17 points in 14 games as well to rank second in league scoring for defensemen.
 
"I'm just giving 100 per cent every night, sticking to our system, when we play our game we can compete wth anyone, give respect to the opposition, insert cliche here," said Steven Stamkos who is the only player in the WCHL still to have scored in every game of the season for his team.
 
Mike Richards just shook his head while listening to Stamkos sound off.
 
"What a dork," said Richards to his young teammate. "We are hotter than a habinaro pepper and we'll burn your ass even worse. Booooyyyaaaaaaaaa!"
 
Richards then gave a shout out to Carolina Hurricanes GM Mike McFarland for no apparent reason.
 
"The Canes are doing a good rebuilding their team. Looks like the Cornrow Kid is getting smart. Maybe he stopped being a cheap (deleted) bastard and learned it's not just (deleted) who should be pumping his (expletitive deleted)...I mean gas," said Richards of the Hurricanes who are leading the Adams Division currently.
 

Mike "Cornrows" McFarland was the subject of praise and scorn from the Flames' Mike Richards.
 
The Flames aren't alone in their hot streak though, as the Anaheim Ducks are also rolling along on their own seven game winning streak, leaving them just two points behind the Flames with a record of 11-2.
 
"We rock out with our sticks out," said the normally bashful Sidney Crosby.
 
Crosby has a lot to brag about though, as he leads the entire league is scoring with 32 points in 13 games, a pace that will see Crosby score 202 points if he maintains the pace for all 82 games. The next highest total is 24 from fellow Ducks teammate Logan Couture.
 
The Ducks and Flames have a lot more to prove other than they are hot right now though. Both teams have been blessed with talented rosters for several seasons, but in recent years have failed to do much in the playoffs. The Flames have been bounced in the first round the past two years, both times in five games. The Ducks have reached the second round both years after struggling to even make the playoffs, including knocking out th Flames last year. Both times though the Ducks have been dropped in the second though, including a four-game sweep at the hands of the Sharks last year.
 
"We want that silver mug. Beer tastes good out of it," said long-time Duck Duncan Keith. "The ladies love you long time too when you win it. They think it's hot. When we won it a few years back, I partied so hard the day I had with the cup. It was crazy, like The Hangover movies or something. I woke up in Switzerland sleeping with Kathy Bates under a sheepskin blanket with a pet orangutan named Jim and a tattoo of a she-male on my left butt cheek. It took four days for the cup to turn up in Mongolia. No idea how it got there but when they found it it was full of only orange Reese Pieces and had cobra fangs sticking out of it. It was a really messed up time and I had to go through detox for a meth addiction. It was awesome."
 

 
Duncan Keith has no memory of it, but he was spotted in the German gay pride parade during a wild bender with the WCHL Cup.
 
The Ducks and Flames will be eyeing getting their hands back on that prize this post-season, but until then it's time to make some hay in the regular season nd earn a good seed.
 
"Yep, you want that top spot," agreed Ducks netminder Martin Broduer. "It's key. It means you get to face some crap team that sucks monkey balls. That reminds me of a story about the Pittsburgh Penguins cup celebrations after Season 12 year. Long story short, (Penguins GM) Patrick Matthews has a restraining order against him from the San Francisco City Zoo. That monkey still sits in the corner. Just smokes cigarettes all day, shake uncontrollably and scream if you show him a banana. Really weird."
 

 
George the monkey hasn't been the same since a visit from the Penguins Patrick Matthews last summer.
 

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1 Response to Flames; Ducks dominating early

  1. Kurt says:

    HAHAHAHAHA!!
    Cornrow Kid. hahaha. I forgot about that.

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